I Refuse to Apologize

I consider myself a pretty upbeat person. Okay, in reality, I AM an upbeat person, it's not just in my mind. It's a fact.  It's in my DNA. You can ask anyone who really knows me, and they'll agree.



Over the years, I have been accused of being "too happy;" I've been accused of  being "Pollyanna," "perky,"  "wearing rose-colored glasses,"  "naive Nellie," or "Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm." (Yes, it will tell your age if you have a clue who Rebecca is.) I've even been called "chronically cheerful" -- think about that one. There's a variety of other things that have been used to refer to my disposition. Do people have nothing better to do?

None of these bother me, because I'm sure it probably gets annoying at times that I'm a pretty evenly happy person. Not sure why, but apparently it does.

The only thing that bothers me is when people think that my good cheer and happiness are not real.

How in the world would anyone else have a clue about my heart? To begin with, I think it would be a very stressful task indeed to have to fake happiness. And while some days we have to 'put on a happy face' to get through hard times, until the sun returns again -- that's not what I mean. I mean to live your life in a fake, pretend way to impress other people with your feigned happiness -- what kind of life would that be?

Mind you, I am not ALWAYS smiling -- I have my moments as a wife, mom, employee, daughter, and human being when I am much less than pleasant, cheerful or otherwise fun to be around. I have witnesses of that, should they need to be provided. But I consider it one of my own personal blessings that I have been given the gift of happiness.

As a rule, I like getting up each day; I enjoy the day-to-day things that make my life what it is. Things change, tomorrow could bring a whole new set of challenges. Should it be so, I have confidence I can still face them and be happy. (This is not a gauntlet I'm throwing down, asking to be challenged until I'm unhappy!) This is a statement about me, about who I am, and how I feel.

I LOVE my family, I LOVE my church and my knowledge of the gospel, I LOVE my dear friends who share this journey with me, and I LOVE the fact that tomorrow is a clean slate to start it all over again.

My approach to challenge is head on. I try to maintain a calm composure, and resolve the problem with a positive, even outlook and confidence that every problem can eventually be resolved...I guess this approach can be considered fake, uninformed or less than intelligent. Should that 'consideration' change me? I think not.

I am not naive.  I am not overly curious, but I am also not unobservant or unaware of life around me. The lenses in my glasses are clear. My life is certainly not perfect, nor do I believe it to be. If I choose to face those imperfections in a "chronically cheerful" way, ahem...I believe that is my choice.

I am loved.
I have others to love.
I am healthy.
I have a beautiful family.
I have a happy home.
I am grateful.
I have faith.
I am blessed.
I have talents.
I have a great job.
I have music.
I have service.
I have opportunity.
I have friends who know my heart.
I have joy.
And the list goes on...

These things make me happy -- it shows.

For that, I will not apologize.